Shimmer Volume 7

Shimmer Volume 7

We begin the volume with part of an online-exclusive Daizee Haze promo where she challenged Rebecca Knox to a sixty minute Ironman match before that is interrupted by Dave Prazak apologising and explaining that that match has had to be cancelled after Rebecca Knox suffered a career threatening head injury and will be out of action for quite some time. I still find it disappointing that we never got to see that ironwoman contest as it would have been incredible.

Tiana Ringer vs Lorelei Lee

TIANA! Ringer’s back and I’m delighted to see her again. She’s now sporting a very good short shorts and pigtails look. I was so excited to see her back that I nearly didn’t notice the entrance curtain is now at the bottom of the stairs rather than the top and we have the Shimmertron above the entrance way. Also and for the first time in Shimmer we have entrance lights too. All great changes which make the company look much more professional. Lorelei Lee’s got a new cowboy hat after giving her last one away to a girl in the crowd, but she then gives this one away to a boy in the crowd too. Will she ever learn? On the production front there is less glare from the lights, but now the show seems to have a red tint to it which is annoying and we still have the red ring mat too much to my chagrin.

I’ve not been Lee’s biggest fan so far, but she does impress me here with a Lovely crucifix pin, a nice quick drop toe hold and then a great handspring cross body that she doesn’t botch this time. Ringer’s great entertainment and tries to pin Lee with a cocky pin where she puts a foot across the throat of Lorelei while showing off the guns. It is Tiana that scores the victory, her first singles win, after blocking a monkey flip and connecting with the South Palm Beach Driver. A very short match, but that’s probably the best way to showcase Lee right now without exposing her weaknesses and Tiana looked great in it.

We cut to a Haze promo where she seems gutted that the sixty minute ironwoman match is off, but then says that she noticed that Cheerleader Melissa is also without a match tonight and challenges Melissa to beat her. This was odd as why the hell in kayfabe would Cheerleader Melissa not have a match?! I know Raw does that all the time, but seeing as Haze/Melissa goes on last this show started with technically no main event! Silly.

Cindy Rogers vs Ariel

Cindy’s so annoying with her bouncing around during her entrance. She looks like a child with ADD. Ariel simply just walks to ring and comes across as much better face. The two shake hands when they both first enter the ring and then again when the bell rings which means that after such a friendly start one of them has got to be turning! I have mentioned time and time again that I don’t like Rogers look or character but I’ll admit her actual wrestling is good, she calls herself the definition of technician after all, and here she does a couple of gorgeous looking submission moves. Rogers hits Ariel with a facebreaker, but only gets a two count. She pins her once more and again gets two so she tries a third time, but this time has a handful of tights which the referee notices and so the heel turn begins. Rogers goes to whip Ariel to the ropes but it is counted into a Dariel for the win. Cindy refuses a handshake afterwards and walks out.

The match was alright with some nice submissions by Cindy but her lack of charisma and the fact she steals the charisma of the wrestler she’s facing means I can only enjoy her matches so much. Hopefully this heel turn hinted here makes her more engaging a character as the most interesting thing she’s done in seven volumes is decide to wear kneepads. Thrilling.

A typically great Lacey promo follows where she says that “This Nikki Roxx girl. Wants to main event like me. I don’t even know who she is, what did she crawl out of a hole or something? Me and Rain are the best tag team in the world and trying to prove ourselves in the tag ranks, but I’ll accept the challenge though and treat this match as a nice little warm up before my real competition.”  Fricking great condescending promo!

The Experience vs Serena Deeb & Portia Perez

Canadian Perez is wearing what became her usual pink and black look, which I think I heard her say was not actually a Bret Hart tribute like one might assume but just a happy coincidence. I’ve always wanted British wrestlers to have their own signature colour in the same way Canada have pink and black. Serena is again wearing her pink outfit, does she have any other clothes? At least her team are in matching colours however. During the introductions ring announcer Joey Eastman mistakenly says that the Experience weigh a combined 405 lbs rather than 305 in a hilarious moment. Lexie Fyfe grabs his nose and slaps it he sells it well. Eastman then introduces Portia, who is making her main show debut here with an odd “This is Portia Perez” which I think she should have kept during her later heel run as it sounds like a heelish introduction. Portia looks so cute here with her hair in bunches. It looks like she’s just out of school. Lovely deep armdrags by Serena to start this match and it is during this contest that I see the potential she later showed for the first time. This was a rather short contest and Perez got worked over for most of it before the Experience put her down with the Goadbuster for yet another win.

I didn’t like this match and it was solely down to the Experience which was a shame as I was starting to change my tune on them. They gave Portia nothing in this match at all during their beat down and aside from a nice spinning heel kick I’m not sure she was allowed to do another move. Also during the hot tag Serena came in and knocked them both down and waited for them to get to their feet, but they took ages to do so and then left the ring which completely extinguished the hot tag and made Deeb look silly. This was a chance for the newcomers to look good but by not letting Perez show any of what she could do and by sandbagging the hot tag, unintentionally as it most likely was, the Experience did not allow it.

Cheerleader Melissa then has a surprisingly good angry promo. For all of Melissa’s great attributes I’ve l never been a fan of her mic work and dread hearing her speak, but this was fairly decent. I do HATE that after every promo the Shimmer logo appears right in the middle of the screen and over the wrestler’s faces however as it just kills the important final line. Here for instance Melissa says she’s going to win and stares down the camera looking threatening but it’s ruined by a big purple ‘M’ overlapping her face. I get they want people to know these promos are from Shimmer in case any appear online and so the viewer is aware of the promotion but they could achieve just the same by having the word ‘Shimmer’ at the bottom of the screen and fading to black. This is something Shimmer has not improved at all and still does today so perhaps I’m the only one who’s bothered by this. Oh well.

Rain vs MsChif

Oooh I’m looking forwards to this! Rain always looks rather unhinged with her crazy expressions as she enters the ring, which is saying something as she’s in there with MsChif and still manages to look like the mental one! As Rain works over the ribs of MsChif Danger wonders if Rain & Lacey wrecking homes is purely a Minnesota or a national thing. MsChif later tries to do her usual reverse bodyscissors submission but Rain simply sits down her and applies a sick looking Boston Crab. Holy crap! Seven volumes in and I’m still amazed at MsChif’s flexibility. Chif escapes and hits her beautiful standing moonsault again, but she sells the ribs afterwards.

Dave explains that MsChif had a rib injury coming into this match so well done for Rain for working on the ribs this match and Danger puts her over for doing so. Rain continues to work the injury as she holds onto the top rope and stomps on the ribs of MsChif. Rain applies an abdominal stretch but MsChif is able to lift her up and hit a desperation jawbreaker. Cheerleader Melissa comes out, presumably because she wants another match with MsChif, and the momentarily distraction allows Rain to hit a lungblower for a near fall after which a frustrated Rain lets out a MsChif-like scream. MsChif hits a rolling cutter (which future Shimmer wrestler Nicole Matthews would later use as her finish) that she calls the ‘Call from the Grave’. I’ve never been able to decide if MsChif’s move names were awesome, or silly. Lacey runs out to the ring and knocks Melissa over. Lacey jumps onto the apron, distracts the referee, and throws Rain a chain behind his back. Rain hits MsChif with the chain, but Melissa had pulled Lacey off the apron and so the referee had turned round just in time to see it and we have our first DQ in Shimmer.

That was a disappointing end to what was an enjoyable match. Rain has always been great at working body parts and sticking to it throughout the whole match and did so here again. MsChif was again able to show off her wrestling skills and how insanely flexible she is. The DQ end was a shame but it does mean that the Melissa/MsChif feud has ended and now been transferred into a MelissChif/MWHC one which could be great as all four women are amongst my favourites. Also it means that Rain doesn’t have to be pinned again as I feel like both her and Lacey have lost enough already.

Nattie Neidhart cuts a promo where she says her opponent tonight Sara Del Rey is “not in for a Rude awakening but a Hart attack and when you mess with the best you die with the rest, yeah baby!” Cool confident delivery, although I’m confused as to whether she was referencing Rick’s Rude old finisher along with the Hart Foundation’s and if so why…

Amber O’Neil vs Allison Danger

Amber runs to Joey and talks to him before her match. I can’t explain why but I always love that Amber despite being heel seems to love Joey Eastman. She hugged him on a previous volume and I feel like with Krissy Vaine gone it’s almost as if he’s the only person in Shimmer she actually likes. I also love how before all her matches she perches herself on a turnbuckle and sits there bored waiting for her opponent. It gives her a cocky edge. Allison’s wearing a T-Shirt that reads “50% Canadian, 50% American & 100% Dangerous” which I am really grateful for because in a later volume she starts to say that catchphrase but is interrupted and I always wanted to know what she was 100% of!

Amber mocks Danger’s entrance pose as the bell rings which made me laugh and we are joined once again by Daffney! For some reason a silly “USA” chant breaks out despite both women being American… or at least 50% American. In fact this crowd are pretty awful all show and they don’t really get into any match and seem more interested in entertaining themselves than letting the wrestlers do it. At one point a female fan shouts out that she thinks Amber sucks and O’Neal replies with ”You suck fat butt!” which earns her a “You got served!” and Amber a potential MVP award for shutting down the fans.

Amber stupidly gets into a chop exchange with Danger which backfires and then she retreats to the corner where Allison kicks her in the mouth. O’Neil asks the ref if her teeth are alright and then asks again if he’s sure. Being reassured that her teeth are fine she then turns to Danger with a “YOU’RE DEAD!” and dropkick Danger’s legs. So O’Neal wants to kill Allison who wants Knox dead. At this rate this could be the first wrestling promotion that has an actual Battle Royale. Dave asks Daffney what she’s up to in Shimmer and once more I forgot she was commentating as she’s so very quiet again. Daffney is wishy-washy on her intentions but suggests possibly managing. Amber continues to work on Danger’s legs and applies a Boston crab which Dave informs us is a good tactic as it removes the Shimmering Warlock from Allison’s arsenal. Good logic there.

Amber lets go of the hold and then her and Allison get into a forearm exchange as Daffney says she wouldn’t take one of Danger’s for a million dollars. Huh? You’re a wrestler, of course you would unless you’re on a contract so high that it makes Brock Lesnar jealous! Allison then gives Amber not one, not two, but five German suplexes and I’m glad she did stop at five as they were getting worse as they went on. Amber gets up and tries to lift Danger for a shinbreaker but due to the previous German suplexes her back gives in so she has to do a neckbreaker instead. The end does come a little out of the blue when Allison applies an STF and earns herself the submission victory. Allison celebrates and then limps to the back.

I said two volumes ago that I wanted O’Neal to get a higher profile match and I got my wish here, though it wasn’t totally successful. While parts of this match had really great psychology at other times, and this might be because the crowd weren’t into it, it was but a bit dull. I’ve still not seen the same intensity that I saw from O’Neal during her first match with Serena and I thought we’d get it here when she got angry about her teeth but it didn’t happen.

Lacey vs Nikki Roxx

It’s the battle of the two best entrance themes in the company! Some fans have a ‘MHWC’ sign, but that isn’t enough to escape a verbal lashing from Lacey during her entrance as she insists it should be ‘MN’ for Minnesota. The same fans also have a “Get well K-Nox” sign too. Smarks! Nikki Roxx once again has a new look, this time back to curly hair and now sporting long tights in a pink and white pastel colour pattern which looks exactly like Tiana Ringer’s from earlier. Honestly they could be a tag team with those attires! This is the first match that got the crowd into the action as they hate Lacey and love Nikki as the “Nikki!” “ROXX!” “Lacey!” “SUCKS!” chants begin. The fans are in fact on Lacey’s case all match and sing that she has rabies and crabs! Ouch.

The Home-Wrecker whips Nikki chest first into the turnbuckles, saying “Nikki Roxx, meet turnbuckles”, and then hits a knee attack to her back which she tries to get the fans to admit was a pretty cool move, but they remain unimpressed with her. Lacey hits a painful looking backdrop to Nikki and then follows that up with a neckbreaker before floating over and applying a guillotine choke, which Roxx counters with a Northern Lights suplex for a two. Both women get up and Nikki then hits the Barbie Crusher for the upset victory.

I really enjoyed this match. Nikki Roxx is really making the most of her big opportunities and continues to impress each time she wrestles. I’ve been singing Lacey’s praises since Volume 1 and again she was just great here. She makes wrestling look easy as everything she does is just perfectly done without being flashy or dangerous.

Lufisto vs Mercedes

Lufi!! Yes, I was so happy to hear her music as Lufisto becomes one of my favourites down the line. She’s billed as “The First Lady of Hardcore” having made her name wrestling in thumbtacks, barbed wire and light tube matches, but in Shimmer she goes on to prove that she’s so much more than a garbage wrestler that you wonder why she ever needed to do that in the first place. Mercedes has gone blonde for these tapings and sports a rather kick-ass attire here that looks rather like a karate gi with its belt.

During the match Mercedes ties up Lufisto’s arms and legs together and then tries to catch a breather which I think is such a stupid spot. She did the same to Del Rey on a previous volume, but thankfully Lufisto doesn’t sell being tied up for long and quickly breaks out and denies Martinez a chance to catch her breath. This match was the first time in this re-watch where I’ve started to hate Mercedes’ constant use of the knife edge chop. I hate how she hits her opponents so hard with them as I don’t feel like they add all that much to her matches and only serve to hurt her opponents. She’s drawn blood with them on occasion too and surely the whole point of wrestling is to make it look like it hurts, rather than actually hurt your opponent? I don’t know if the wrestlers view it as some badge of honour to be chopped by Martinez, but I feel like it’s kind of taking advantage of your opponent in the ring. I know during a Ringbelles interview she was asked about some horrible chops she gave to Kellie Skater, which left her chest in a disgusting looking mess, and if it was too much but Mercedes sadly gave out an unsatisfactory kayfabe answer that Kellie chopped her first.

Aside from the many, many chops her Mercedes also busts out a superb looking sitdown powerbomb although such great wrestling moves further go to show that she doesn’t need to resort to chopping so much. Lufisto is able to lock Martinez in a camel clutch and then pulls back Mercedes’ nose for extra pressure before poking her tongue out at the referee when he reprimands her for it. Our first look at the comedy side of Lufisto that would win her so many fans. Lufi climbs the turnbuckles before she misses a diving head-butt and Danger, who’s back on commentary, says she doesn’t know where she is, but it turns out she’s in Suplex City as Mercedes German suplexes her. Both women get back to their feet and Lufisto hits a Death Valley Driver, which Mercedes kicks out of. Wow, that looked like it should have been the finish. I think a DVD should always end a match. Lufisto tries an Emerald Fusion, but Mercedes blocks it and hits the Fisherman buster for three.

I thought this was rather disappointing sadly. I was excited to see Lufisto, but she hasn’t adopted her fun crazy persona just yet with only the one quick comedy spot pointing to the character she will become. As for Mercedes, well as much as I love her promos I’m really not her biggest advocate and those chops reminded of me why that is. Also as charismatic as she is on a microphone I don’t think it transfers all that well to the ring.

Nattie Neidhart vs Sara Del Rey

Once again the Final Countdown stops before the lyrics begin and the crowd are audibly disappointed that they still haven’t been able to sing the song’s chorus. Nattie comes out to ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ which I honestly don’t think is a good mix at all with her heel character. Yes, she’s a heel which is something I always forget about her time in Shimmer. Even after seeing her promo earlier I forgot she was a heel too!

Although I shouldn’t have been I was surprised by how good a mat wrestler Nattie is back when she was in Shimmer. Years of her having to work with subpar talents have soured me a little on her I suppose and I had forgotten that before she became a joke on Total Divas she was pretty great. Nattie dominates the early portion of the match and does her Dad’s “Yeah Baby!” taunt, which Allison kicks off about saying that she’s got a sick smile. Danger’s constant rage at everything the heels do always seems far too over the top. Nattie tries to lock in the Sharpshooter, but Del Rey rolls her up in an inside cradle for two. Neidhart again goes for the Sharpshooter but Sara is able to kick her away.

Sara tries nailing a clothesline, but Nattie ducks it and then hits a German suplex on Del Rey. There have been far too many German suplexes in this show. Nattie tries an Irish whip, but Del Rey blocks it, trips up Neidhart and then pins her with a very creative pin for a near fall. Sara then locks in the Sharpshooter herself but Nattie is able to escape her own move in a cool moment. Neidhart runs the ropes and tries a forearm, but Sara catches her arm and turns it into a Royal Butterfly to extend her undefeated streak to seven. Good match. I was surprised at how much better Nattie was than I remembered and Del Rey was her usual great self.

As Sara celebrates her victory, not forgetting to sell the injury, Mercedes comes out and tells Del Rey that she’ll be facing her at Volume 8 and that she’s going to get her arse handed to her. Two things about this got my attention. One, that I thought the match was [i]already[/i] announced for Volume 8 and two that I felt Martinez came across as fairly heelish here perhaps hinting at an upcoming turn?

Cheerleader Melissa vs Daizee Haze

Melissa is wearing her blue cheerleader outfit now, which is what I consider to be her iconic look. Daizee Haze comes out, without her flower for the first time, and I’ve never mentioned her outfits before but they are always amazing and from what I understand she makes them all herself which is incredible commitment to her craft and further makes Cindy Rogers’ lack of effort all the more glaring. It also might explain why parts of her wrestling gear fall off constantly during this match too! Haze has a little dance with the fans before we begin and Cheerleader Melissa looks thoroughly unimpressed by it. The crowd want Melissa to dance, but that was never going to happen. Thank God too, because that would kill her character! Danger says that Melissa’s “a cheerleader, not a dancer!” Okay I know cheerleaders aren’t really a thing over here in Britain and I don’t know much about cheerleading but don’t they dance?

Daizee, despite the size disadvantage, has the early advantage when the match begins and we have some excellent technical wrestling. We’ve come to expect that from Haze, but Melissa is great too and we get to see her really show off her scientific skills for the first time in Shimmer. Daizee hits a headscissors takedown to Melissa the momentum of which sends her opponent to the floor. Haze dives off the top rope down to Melissa and takes her down. I say ‘dives’, but she really just falls to the floor whenever she does it. Melissa reverses an Irish whip, but Haze stops herself running stomach first into the guard rail, which I absolutely loved as you never see such a logical thing done on that spot. Melissa not missing a beat simply grabs Haze’s legs and wheelbarrow whips into the railings in an incredible sick spot!

The fans begin to chant “You’re a bitch!” to Melissa after that brutal scene. A desperate Haze throws a pom pom at Melissa, but the Cheerleader catches it and shoves it into Haze’s face before whipping her with it too. They head back into the ring and Haze tries to reverse the tide with a crucifix pin, but Melissa is able to hoist her up onto her shoulders and connect with the Samoan drop. Melissa then bends Haze around the turnbuckles it almost seems more brutal than when she does it to MsChif as I’m not used to seeing Daizee’s back be arched quite like this.

Melissa goes for the Kudo Driver, but it is blocked and Haze tries the Heart Punch only to have that ducked and Melissa drills Haze with the Air Raid Crash which might have ended the match were it further away from the ropes. Melissa tries a second Air Raid Crash but Haze counters it into a sunset flip, which is sadly botched and looks really awkward as they try and get Melissa’s shoulders down. Haze tries another Heart Punch, but Melissa wriggles free and axe kicks the back of Haze’s head. Another Kudo Driver attempt is thwarted and Haze hits the Heart Punch on her third attempt. Daizee goes for the Mind Trip, but Melissa shoves her stomach first into the ropes and then it is third time lucky for her as Haze bounces right back into a Kudo Driver for the three. Oh. My. God! That Kudo Driver looked absolutely incredible and well worth the wait that seven volumes worth of teases has built up to. The move looks deadly and should be an instant KO but as the ref counted three Haze rolled her shoulders up just after the pinfall which was an awful move as it looked like she nearly kicked out and kind of undersells how devastating the Kudo Driver is.

I really liked this match. I loved how it showed that Haze was the better wrestler, but Melissa was the better brawler and the momentum changer of the match being the wheelbarrow attack into the guardrails was superb. The ending spell, minus the untimely botch was very exciting too. Honestly aside from Haze’s bizarre selling of the Kudo Driver the only other quibble I’d have with this match is perhaps that given the size difference between these two I would have preferred to have had Melissa start out the match the strongest before Haze capitalises on a mistake or something and then gains the upper hand. Some might find it odd that Melissa is back to wrestling a heel style here when she seems on the cusp of a face turn, but we all hate it when a heel becomes popular with the crowd and then changes completely once they’ve turned, so I liked it. Besides everybody is a heel when facing Haze! This was great and it really did feel like the Melissa I know and love in some ways began here as we got our first wheelbarrow whip, our first Kudo Driver, our first Curb Stomp attempt in quite some time and she was wearing her famous blue cheerleader outfit.

Melissa has little time to celebrate however as Rain and Lacey quickly sprint to the ring and beat her down, hitting their full nelson/drop kick double team move. MsChif of all people comes out for the save, or perhaps just for revenge herself as the commentators sell shock at the rescue. MsChif’s wearing a Shimmer t-shirt which I’m not sure if I like as her character wearing clothes that normal people wear just seems odd to me! Lacey is irate and says that this is none of MsChif’s business and that they are the best tag team in the world and challenge the unlikely duo to a match at Volume 8. The show ends with Melissa and MsChif arguing in the ring, both unhappy at having to team given all the bad blood and history between them.

Overall show:

Aside its qualities of being the rarest of Shimmer DVD’s I don’t think this has been one of the best shows I’ve watched so far. I can really only fully recommend the main event with perhaps passing mentions to Del Rey/Neidhart and Lacey/Roxx. There are some positive signs however with how the show is presented with the changes to the entrance way making things look much more professional even if it’s a little red.

Best match: Cheerleader Melissa vs Daizee Haze. Aside from a few minor missteps I really enjoyed this and would say it’s the best main event since Volume 4.

MVP: I’m going to give this one to Cheerleader Melissa. The curbstomp appears to be back in her arsenal, we this is the first time she uses her wheelbarrow whip attack and the first time she uses the Kudo Driver. She’s also ditched the duster and adopted her most famous look. Cheerleader Melissa has been great right from the get go, but this is where all the pieces have fallen into place for her now and we’re about to get the start of her face turn.

So join me next time for Sara Del Rey vs Mercedes Martinez III and Lacey & Rain vs Cheerleader Melissa and MsChif not to mention the return of....Josie! Yay...